Keeping Your Relationship Healthy
Divorce rates are still rising and finding a couple that is still together even after five years is a miracle. Finding a couple who are dating for more than a year is a miracle. Instead of trying to figure out how to rebuild a relationship that is crumbling, people should, from the onset, work on ways to keep it healthy without it falling to pieces and scrambling to save it when it’s too late. Any relationship, be it romantic or otherwise, should start off on the right foot to avoid miscommunication that will ruin it.
No one likes a person who insists on being right all the time or is a know it all. Both members of the relationship need to realize this and admit it when they are wrong. It takes a very strong person to face up to their mistakes, but in the long run, they will feel better about themselves when they do. Remember this when dealing with people. Stop and consider someone else’s feelings and opinions before you tell them they are wrong.
If you do something wrong or make a mistake, apologize for it. Don’t hold it in. By telling your partner that you were wrong and that you are sorry for whatever it is you need to apologize for, you are showing them that you willing to move past it and let it go. You are showing your partner that you are mature and are able to accept your mistakes. Want to be even more mature? Apologize even you don’t believe you are wrong. More arguments start over these types of situations and sometimes it’s just best to let it go.
Assuming you know your partner better than they know themselves is a really bad idea. You may know a lot about them, but you don’t know everything. You are not a mind reader. You don’t know what they are thinking, or feeling and it is very rude not to take their side of the argument into consideration. They have the right to speak their mind just like you do. Communication is not one-sided and in order to keep a relationship healthy, it must be a two-way street. You know what they say about assumption right?
Don’t rub things in. That is the quickest way to rile your partner and start a fight. The relationship should not be about who is right or wrong, who is on top, or who has scored the most proverbial points. If you discover something about your partner that proves something you said was right, acknowledge it and move on. No one likes to be told over and over that they were wrong. You want to be in a mutually happy relationship, not a bad one.
Try not to focus on only your needs and priorities. That’s selfish and uncaring. You need to make sure you pay attention to your partner’s needs. When you do, when you meet their needs, you can be assured that yours will met as well. Many times, you share the same needs as they do and you can kill two birds with one stone. Compromise is another key to a healthy relationship. Don’t forget that your partner has needs too.
When having a discussion with your partner, let them finished what they have to say before speaking. Don’t interrupt them because when you do, you have stopped listening to them. You are also making them feel that your opinion is more important then theirs. Hold your tongue until they are done and then have your say. If they interrupt you, remind them that you let them say their piece and ask them to afford you’re the same courtesy. Communication, once again, is a two-way street. Try to stay on it and swerve into the lane.
No one is perfect, but make sure you can live up to your side of the relationship. Don’t make promises you can’t keep because that leads to disappointment when you can’t follow through. Make sure you and your partner have reasonable expectations of each other. Setting one another on a pedestal only sets you up for failure. If you can’t promise something, let your partner know you’ll do the best you can. Most of the time, that’s more than enough for anyone.
Remember to be adaptable and willing to listen to your partner. When starting out in a relationship, give yourself and your partner space to breathe while keeping the lines of communication open. Most people forget that the basis of a healthy relationship, besides common ground, is the ability to talk, adapt, and respect the other. When all of these are met and worked at, any relationship has a chance to blossom and grow.